Dear God, You just may end up alone in that your house.

My Father, which art in heaven,

Before I begin my complain or statements or possible accusations; because frankly with how I am feeling, I do not know the tone this letter will take, let me remind you of what Nana from Pankshin said.

You remember how Nana was very staunch and tied to her traditional ways and beliefs. You know she didn’t want to accept you. The preacher however through the help of your word and spirit, pierced through her zealous heart and changed her mind and ways. And what happened next? Trials and tribulations of all magnitude came her way but Nana held fast. Her zeal, a character trait you put in her could not be shaken, her mind was made up. Until that day.

It was either bible study or some regular evening service she went for, I forget which one but I know you know. Nana was joyfully singing one of the hymns she had been taught and that was the last thing she remembered. When she came to, she was on the other side of the road and in her line of sight, at the spot she was previously standing was a cow. The people that surrounded her said, the cow had charged towards her, lifted her up and flung her across the street. I mean was the cow aiming to throw her up to heaven? Was it some Elijah on the chariot with the horses parody gone wrong? You don’t make mistakes so I know it wasn’t so. But till we all get to heaven, we will just remain with our speculations.

Nana was hurt and humiliated not because of the cow incident but because not too far from where she had been standing was a beer palour with some drunkards laughing merrily at her expense. After she dusted herself and made sure she could walk, what did she tell you? I know you remember it clearly. Nana shook her little finger at you, oh how I wish I could write this with the weight it carries in the Ngas language. She said, “these are the kinds of things you do that will make no one follow you. So you allowed that cow to leave those men drinking in the bar and come and hit me that just left church. Don’t worry, keep doing it and you will end up alone in that your house”.

Father… I am almost at the point of lifting and pointing my little finger.

You know Nana isn’t the only person that has questioned you on these your ways. Didn’t King David ask you, who you wanted to praise you if you didn’t deliver your people? Weren’t his questions valid enough to be recorded in the book of Psalms?

Eternal optimism is one of the character traits you have given me but I am human and sometimes we take a break. Even if it is not for too long. So I will end this letter by borrowing and cling on to some of Brother Paul’s words:

“We are often troubled but not crushed,

Sometimes in doubt but never in despair,

There are many enemies, but we are never without a friend,

And though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed”.

This is what I will say… for now.

Eagerly awaiting your reply,

Your daughter,

Ulan ‘do something new in my life’ Matta.



  1. Howie · September 5, 2015

    Very well written and YES, we all have days like that… hang in there!


  2. tchaliyah · September 5, 2015

    Na real “Ulan ‘Do something in my life Matta”. My own is “Chalya ‘you must change my story’ Dul. Hehehehe. I want to meet this Nana please.


    • thecontainedlife · September 5, 2015

      Hahaha, I like yours it paints the whole picture. She is my Mom’s Grandmother’s cousin.


  3. Samira Gomwalk · September 6, 2015

    I smiled. Don’t we all get pushed that we question Him sometimes? I’ve been there.


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